Didn't like any of my potential titles for this one.

I feel that today, like many days so far in this deployment, was a success. Of course, I've learned to set the bar lower, but still.
I've got a sitter coming in twice a week for 3 hours each time, to either help me out around the house, stay with the kids while I run errands or shop for food, or play with the little boys while the big kids and I do some uninterupted school work, or pretty much whatever I need her to do. So today, she hung out with the kids while I stopped by a neighbor's house to dig through her piles of clothes she was giving away (got a ton of pants, and a few shorts and shirts for Aaric, plus a nice microscope), and then I went to get my new Blackberry. I have no clue how to work half the stuff on there, but that's another story.
Knowing I wouldn't be back until near dinner time, I planned for us to go out. First time going to a real restaurant since Michael left. I went to Smokey Bones because kids eat free on Mondays. It went pretty well other than Gabriel refusing to eat or even sit anywhere other than my lap, the server being a bit to slow with the boxes and check, and the kids (understandably) getting wiggly (and "crawl under the benches-y" and "dance in the aisle-y") but whatever, we didn't get any glares from neighboring tables so I call it a success.
Then we stopped by Food Lion to grab the basics for breakfast and snacks for PWOC tomorrow. Real food shopping will have to wait a couple days. Gabriel refused to sit in the seat, he had to be in the main part of the cart. And then he refused to sit. And then he kept leaning over the side. And then he wanted to walk, which of course turned into him running way ahead and me having to abandon the cart and other kids to catch him and wrangle him into the seat and buckle. Luckily, I was heading for the register by then anyway.
So, as I'm loading stuff onto the belt, Xander hands me a pack of Bubble Yum and asks if I want that kind. I say "No thanks, I don't want that kind, put it back please!" and continue with my business. I pay, we head out the door, I'm feeling pretty decent that we made it out of there alive, and I drive home. [I'm aware that I just changed tenses in that paragraph, and it's bugging me, but I just can't bring myself to re-write it. Sorry.)
Xander headed straight for the recliner and hid behind it. Hiding is his trademark pooping MO, so I assumed that's what he was doing. "No, it's just, this is my fort." I told him it wasn't fort time, it was bed time, and continued with putting food away. Then I went to look for him. He was hiding behind a door. I pulled him out, prepared to guide him toward the bathroom, when i saw it.
the huge wad of blue in his mouth. I pulled him up and saw two more big wads on the floor, and one unopened piece. I still haven't found the outer wrapper.
This is the first time that one of my kids has actually made it home with stolen property. I reached in his pockets to make sure there was no more, and found a dollar. He could have paid for it! He had no clue that was there, and (rightly) guessed that I would have said no for tonight anyway. We talked about stealing, and I told him we'd be going back in tomorrow so he can apologize and pay. He still acted like it was no big deal. I said, "Xander, do you know that people can go to jail for stealing?" He replied, "Yeah. I habn't seed a jail before. I wanna see what it looks like!" Great.
Gabriel wanted a juice box. I'd just bought some tiny ones, so I gave him one. Xander went into the kitchen to get one off the counter, and I told him he couldn't have one, because he already had his treat, gum, and that was it for the night. He says, "Mom, juice is not the problem."
I sat him down, got him looking at me, and said, "no, you're right, baby. Juice is not the problem. Your heart is the problem. Disobedience is the problem." To which he rolled his eyes, laid back to the floor and said, "I'm too tiiii-rrrrred."

Around that time, Mikayla told me she was going to take a shower. Gabriel said happily, "bah?" (bath.) I very clearly said, "no, no bath right now." And he said, "yay! bah!" Uh, am I missing something here? So we went through it a few more times, each with him celebrating about his bath. He even went into the bathroom and took off his diaper and pants and got into the tub, and looked genuinely confused when I said no again. Kinda like when he asks to nurse, and I say no. We'll go a few rounds with it. "Neh?" "No, not now." And then, just as cheerfully and hopefully, "Neh?" "I just said no." And again, "neh?" It takes a while, but he'll eventually starting the whining. Or when he brought my camera to me yesterday, and I said, "oh thank you for my camera!" and he said, "no, MINE!" "No, Gabriel, it's my camera." "MINE!" Bright-eyed, and certain that he was right. Not arguing with me, just clearly proclaiming what he believed to be true. I have to admire his optimism.