Thursday, January 18, 2007

Mikayla the Bully

We'd been outside chatting with the neighbors, but it was time to go in to clean the house. Michael told Mikayla to come in, she resisted, drama ensued. Thirty minutes later with her wailing on the stairs and them arguing back and forth, I offered to intervene. I got a brilliant idea. I knew she needed to calm down, and we also needed her to be out of the way so we could get work done. So I grabbed up some cardboard (we happened to have just broken down a ton of boxes from the garage) and some crayons and took her to her bed. I got her attention with "HEY, YOU WANNA COLOR??" I went on to explain that I wanted her to draw a picture of how she felt and why she was so angry and then I'd come back and we'd talk.
A little while later, on her bed, we discuss her drawings. "This is me, and I'm sad and angry. This is Daddy, and you see? He's pulling my arm. I didn't want to come inside, I was getting grass to make wheat so we could make bread because I'm hungry. I'm mad at Dad. He can't be in my club because he's mean and boys aren't allowed. See..." she pauses to draw a circle around him and then a huge X over it, "I crossed him." So then we discuss that she should have just told him that she wanted a snack, and I also explained that wheat doesn't come from grass. The chat continues, as we try to come up with a snack that she wants and that I agree would be an okay snack. She insists on chocolate, I refuse to cave. I get drawn and crossed and kicked out of the club too. Baby boys and their mommies are allowed in, except me. Because I'm mean.
Somehow, the topic turns to her friends at church. We talk about a few of them, and then she starts to draw a picture and says that it's Caroline. "Caroline is not my friend." Caroline gets crossed. I ask why she doesn't like Caroline, and what Caroline does that's mean.
"She told on me."
"Well what did she tell on you for doing?"
"I pushed her!"
"Why did you push her? That isn't nice."
"Because I don't like her. She's not my friend, and she's mean."
"So, you pushed her, and she told on you, and that's why she's mean?"
"YES!"
I finally talked her into trying to be nice to Caroline despite her being so terribly mean, and she even talked about it Sunday morning before church. She was going to be nice to Caroline to see if maybe they can be friends afterall. But Caroline wasn't there Sunday. I hope it's not because she told her parents about the bully of the class.

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